Finding positives in a bad situation can seem impossible. Today, Chloe shares how she learnt this skill, and the events which lead her there.
Hi everybody! I’m Chloe, and I blog over at Chloe Elizabeth about all things fashion, lifestyle and mental health. There’s a little bit of everything over on there – if you can think of it, it’s probably there! It’s a pleasure to meet you all, and it’s an absolute pleasure to have the opportunity to write a guest post for Ruth’s blog.
Today I wanted to talk a little bit about a personal journey of mine. More specifically, how I learnt to see the good in the bad. I’m sure you’ve all been told before about how our mind determines our subsequent mood, and vice versa. Personally, as a recent psychology graduate, I think that the relationship between our thoughts and mood is a lot more complicated than that as we have hormones and neurotransmitters, such as serotonin, that are involved. But, I definitely think that having a positive mindset can help us when it comes to dealing with the negative.
This journey stems from my own difficulties with depression, anxiety and mental health, as has been briefly mentioned on my blog. I was adamant that I was nothing, that I wouldn’t be able to ‘pay my own way’ in life because I didn’t have a job at the time.
Did you know, I spent the entire four years of my degree convinced that I had failed almost every exam I sat? I went on to achieve a first class, and didn’t fail a single module.
I think the above points go on to prove how irrational the brain can be at times and why it’s so important to be able to recognise this! A few months later, I’ve managed to put these thoughts to bed. I’ve graduated, passed my driving test, found myself a job and I’m looking at how I can earn a second income from blogging. Never did I think I’d be in this position, and it’s crazy to me how wrong my thoughts were!
Since starting my recovery it has become really important to me that I look for the positives inside the negatives and show gratitude for what I have. A few of my examples are that I’m not able to afford my own flat/house yet, but the positive here is that I have a roof over my head, my own bedroom, and I am fortunate enough to be able to share this with my wonderful family. I am currently only working part time, which unfortunately means I don’t earn as much money as I’d like, but this gives me more time and energy to pour into my blog, and hopefully I can in turn start to earn a secondary income from this. Even the smaller daily hassles can be turned into positives. I have to catch two buses to work today, but this means that I have extra time to read my blog and reply to some emails!
I am from the UK, and this means that I am blessed enough to receive a constant, healthy water supply. I get free healthcare when I need it and I have a wonderful set of friends who always look out for me and I love them all to pieces. I make mistakes, but I own up to them when I do, take full responsibility and learn lessons from these. Failure in itself is not a negative thing. It becomes negative when we refuse to look at the feedback and learn those lessons, and we begin to dwell in our own self-pity. I failed my driving test three times before I passed on my fourth attempt. I was really disappointed at the time and I thought I’d never pass, but the truth of it is that if I’d have passed first time, I’d have had far less experience on the roads than I do now!
Thanks to everybody for taking the time to read this post. I am incredibly grateful for that. Please do share some of your positives down in the comments, I’d love to hear them!
If you enjoyed this guest post, why not take a look at Simon’s contribution from last week?