Internet dating: a success story

Internet dating: a success story

Internet dating doesn’t have the best reputation – understandably so, given some of the horror stories I have read. I thought it would be a nice change to put a story out there which has a happy ending and better yet, it’s my very own story.

I do still think there’s a bit of a stigma around internet dating, presumably because of the previously mentioned horror stories. Personally, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. I’m not only saying that because I met someone using it. Even before, it seemed a perfectly reasonable way to meet someone. I am horribly shy with no interest and going out to meet people in the usual ways. So, what’s a girl to do? Internet dating gave me an opportunity to find people who I wouldn’t have met otherwise.

In fairness, I have had the odd message which made me uncomfortable. I think it’s important to keep things in perspective. There’s nothing stopping someone saying strange things in person, or sending you them on Facebook or Twitter. As much as I wish it wasn’t an issue, it’s a risk in any place. While it may happen more often on dating sites,ย it’s not exclusive to them, which is why I don’t think they should be ruled out on that basis.

As I mentioned inย this post, I am currently in the happiest, healthiest relationship of my life. Without internet dating, this wouldn’t have been possible. Here’s the story of how I met the love of my life, and it’s all thanks to OkCupid.

After failing to figure things out with an ex-boyfriend, I decided to sign up to OkCupid. I chose this because I had used it in the past and found it had pretty decent guys on there. In general, they were good at holding a conversation and pleasant enough. Even when romance failed to blossom, they were interesting and friendly.

A day after signing up, I received a message. It wasn’t the most exciting message in the world, and I have since tirelessly mocked my current partner for his choice of opening line. I suppose I found it endearing, so I had a nosy at his profile. This guy was 300 miles away in Aberdeen. I had very little interest in a long-distance relationship, but I didn’t want to ignore him. I discovered we did have a few things in common, so I replied to him and we continued talking.

After more cringe-worthy exchanges and feeble attempts at flirting, we exchanged numbers. Still, I didn’t have high hopes, because he was too far away and I was looking for someone who lived nearby. Yet, it was hard not to be drawn to him. He was sweet and could make me laugh. As an avid Catfish watcher, I convinced myself there was probably a catch so I was cautious. He seemed to good to be true. Was this guy married? Did he have kids? What wasn’t he telling me?

The only thing I discovered is that he was living with his mum at the time and hadn’t yet learned to drive. Given that he was nearly 30, I was surprised by these facts. However, he explained he was trying to save money to get his own place and I realised it was actually a sensible decision. So, by now, I was running out of reasons to not give it a shot.

We had a very awkward first FaceTime call so I could see for myself that he was who he said he was. I still questioned if I should pursue it. I explained to him that I had reservations about long-distance relationships and basically said it wasn’t what I was looking for. He said he understood, but asked if we could meet before we ruled out the possibility. He was willing to travel 300 miles for a chance at making it work, which I thought was pretty sweet. By this point, I was already a little smitten and figured I had nothing to lose.

So, a few weeks after the first message, he came to visit. I was incredibly nervous. I remember sending plenty of panicked texts to my best friend during my lunch break. Even though it was great online, I had no idea what to expect in person. At first, it was really awkward. He was ridiculously shy, more so than me, and the conversation wasn’t exactly flowing. I was disappointed.

The next day, we went for a walk in the park and things weren’t much better. It was so bad, in fact, that he offered to head home a day earlier than we had planned. I realised it wasn’t what I wanted, so I told him he just needed to relax and be himself. Let’s just say it’s a good job we had this conversation or we wouldn’t have made it this far! He became calmer and his personality began to come through. From that point, there was no going back.

As travelling makes me anxious, he did most of the work, regularly coming to see me so that the long-distance factor wasn’t much of an issue. I began to realise he was completely different to other guys I had dated. He was patient, loving, thoughtful and everything I had been looking for. We both knew it was right, so we didn’t waste much time. Around 6 months later, I moved to Aberdeen to be with him. We’ve been living together for a year now, and I can’t believe how quickly the time has gone.

I do still struggle with living in Aberdeen because it’s so far from everyone else I know and love, but it was the right decision. It’s great we have a little flat together and we get to hang out every day. I think it means even more when you’ve been in a long-distance relationship. You’ve struggled through those times when you couldn’t see each other for weeks and now you get to spend most of your time together? It’s wonderful!

Now, excuse me for a moment while I brag a little.

Neal is not only the best boyfriend I could wish for, but he’s an all-around brilliant person. He is so thoughtful. He has shown me what unconditional love looks and feels like. There isn’t a day goes by where I don’t think about how fortunate I am. He’s never once given me a reason to doubt how he feels about me. He goes out of his way to make me feel special, from little gestures to bigger ones. Even though we have only been together a year and a half, he has supported me through so much, and I feel safe in the knowledge that he’ll stand by me, no matter what happens. I am certain he is the person I am going to spend my life with, and I’m so glad! There’s no one else I could see myself with now.

I would never have had this incredible person in my life, let alone as my partner, if it wasn’t for internet dating!

So, while I understand it might not seem overly appealing at first, I’d recommend giving it a go. You never know who you might find.

Internet Dating Success Story Pin

How did you meet your partner? I’d love to hear some stories in the comments! If you’re single, share your internet dating experiences if you have them and, if not, would you ever try it?



51 Comments

  1. 13th June 2018 / 11:22 am

    Aw.. I am glad it worked out for you and you are in a happy relationship. I have never tried internet dating but I would be tempted especially as I am a bit shy so would help me meet new people ๐Ÿ˜Š

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 11:24 am

      Thank you! I’d say definitely give it a try – if you find it’s not for you, you can always delete your account, but you just never know what could happen! ๐Ÿ™‚

      • 13th June 2018 / 12:12 pm

        Yes that’s true ๐Ÿ˜Š yes it is full of opportunity!! Thank you ๐Ÿ˜Š

  2. 13th June 2018 / 11:33 am

    It gives me such warm fuzzy to read this story as it is so similar to my own. I was talking to lads on a dating site and I met up for quite a few dates but after the relationship I’d got out of I wasn’t really in the place for serious till King came along 8months later and smashed that to pieces! He is the sweetest most attentive and supportive man I’ve had in my life and it makes me so glad I gave internet dating a try!

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 1:28 pm

      Yay! This just confirms it for me: we are probably twins. ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. 13th June 2018 / 11:39 am

    This is so sweet. I’m so happy for you! I’m currently in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend, we met online too probably over 6 years ago now! Neither of us were interested in a long distance relationship either for a long time so we sadly had a bit of a break and stopped properly talking for about 6-8 months, as it was getting pretty difficult. We did get talking again and I’m so glad we did because we ended up deciding to give it a go, and we’ve been together 4 and a half years now! He lives about 2 hours away from me, but when we originally met, it was a 3 hour drive! The first time we met he drove the 3 hours down and back in a day! It was quite scary though with the whole catfish stuff but I too made sure we had a call with a webcam so could make sure he was who he said he was ๐Ÿ˜‚ he is now looking for jobs down my way so fingers crossed. I can’t wait for the days when we finally get to live together ๐Ÿ˜Š

    Amy,
    https://creativenails.uk

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 1:30 pm

      Aww, long distance relationships are really difficult, but I’m glad you two were able to reconnect and get back on track! Just think, you have moving in together and all the exciting stuff still to look forward to! (It’s the best.) All the best to both of you for the future! x

  4. Nati
    13th June 2018 / 11:59 am

    What a beautifully written and honest post Ruth, I’m so glad you found someone so wonderful – you absolutely deserve it! I met my boyfriend through university and we’ve been together for over a year now – we were in a play together and we were the only two actors in it, haha! Sending you good vibes!

    Nati x | http://www.lifeaftercoffeeblog.com | @NAfterCoffee

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 1:30 pm

      Thank you, lovely! Aww, that’s such a cute way to meet your boyfriend! Definitely a good story to tell x

  5. 13th June 2018 / 12:51 pm

    Such a cute love story ๐Ÿ˜

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 1:31 pm

      Thanks, lovely!

  6. 13th June 2018 / 12:59 pm

    Aw this is such an awesome story and Iโ€™m so happy for you both!

    My husband and I actually met on Facebook ๐Ÿ˜‚ We had mutual friends who thought weโ€™d be a good match and hey convinced him to add me as a friend… we chatted on FB for two weeks, met up on the 26th of August 2010 and weโ€™ve been together ever since ๐Ÿ˜ Itโ€™s almost kinda online dating but not…

    Xx

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 1:32 pm

      Aww, that’s sweet! One of my best friends met her now husband the same way you met yours! ๐Ÿ™‚ So glad it’s worked out for you! x

  7. 13th June 2018 / 1:16 pm

    This is such a heart-warming post! I met my husband at university and so I don’t have any first-hand experiences of internet dating, but I do have a few friends who’ve done it and they are now in happy, loving relationships. I definitely think internet dating is a good option if you’re single. As you said in your post, you get to meet people you otherwise wouldn’t have met! It’s lovely to hear that it’s worked for you and I’m glad you’re now happy and settled. X

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 1:34 pm

      Awww, thank you so much, Leah! Meeting people in places like university is awesome, too, and I do think that’s where a lot of people can find love. Seen as though I didn’t go to uni, it wasn’t an option I ever had, but I sometimes do feel a little bit of jealousy for people who have nice stories to tell rather than “online” ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Exactly – I mean, there would have been absolutely no other way for me to meet him when he was 300 miles away so it’s crazy to think how things worked out the way they did, all thanks to the internet! x

  8. 13th June 2018 / 4:55 pm

    Oh, what a lovely story! I’ve never tried internet dating, it wasn’t really a thing when I met Alan over 25 years ago (eeeeep!). We met through work and went out for a few bottles of wine one Friday and the rest, as they say, is history. But Neal sounds like a keeper, and I’m so glad internet dating worked out for you. I wish you both all the very best for the future! x

    Lisa | http://www.lisasnotebook.com

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 7:15 pm

      Thank you so much, Lisa. ๐Ÿ™‚ x

  9. 13th June 2018 / 5:20 pm

    Gaaah, I was making “oohs” and “aahs” while smiling so widely reading this. You guys are so cute! It’s even more amazing to me that there was no ‘instant connection’ or ‘first love’ with you two, and that you built your relationship from square one :)x

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 7:16 pm

      Thanks, sweetheart! ๐Ÿ™‚ We laugh about it now but at the time, we were both so disappointed. Strange to think how different everything could be now if we hadnโ€™t stuck it out! X

  10. 13th June 2018 / 6:14 pm

    What a great post. Loved reading your story. I tried internet dating in the past, back when I was single, with mixed results. There is still a bit of a stigma but there’s definitely nothing wrong with it. I ended up meeting my husband at work, not through a dating app, but I know plenty of people in serious relationships who met online. It’s becoming the norm nowadays. Thanks for sharing your experience – I’m so happy you found The One!

    Nicola
    http://nicshealthylife.co.uk

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 7:17 pm

      Aww, thatโ€™s awesome that you guys met at work! Iโ€™ve always worked in places which are mostly female workers so that was never really on the horizon for me ๐Ÿ˜‚ x

  11. 13th June 2018 / 6:39 pm

    I met my boyfriend of 4 years through internet dating. The first time we met, I remember being so nervous he wouldn’t turn out to be what I thought. I actually had a nervous breakdown over the phone with my best friend on the way to meet him. We were long distance for awhile and it took time to gain that trust and understanding. But now we’re approaching our 4 year anniversary and we moved in together in January. I agree that internet dating can be disappointing at times, but finding love is possible.

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 7:18 pm

      Awww thatโ€™s wonderful!! Congratulations on being almost at 4 years ๐Ÿ˜€ x

  12. 13th June 2018 / 7:17 pm

    Aww this is such a sweet story! Iโ€™m so glad internet dating worked out for you, Neal sounds like such a nice boyfriend โ˜บ๏ธ. I also met my boyfriend Shaun online through Plenty Of Fish, we have been together over two years now. Thank you for sharing your story Ruth, it was lovely to read ๐Ÿ’– xx

    Bexa | http://www.hellobexa.com

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 7:19 pm

      Yeah, heโ€™s a good guy! Yay for you finding someone, too! Iโ€™ve tried Plenty of Fish twice in the past – once I met my ex boyfriend and the other time, it just seemed to be very strange and creepy individuals that were contacting me. So I think, like most sites, itโ€™s hit or miss and Iโ€™m glad it was a success for you ๐Ÿ˜€ x

  13. 13th June 2018 / 7:31 pm

    Ah reading this gave me all the warm fuzzy feels! I am so happy for you guys ๐Ÿ˜Š itโ€™s really good to read a positive internet dating story. I met my husband 11 years ago when I was 15. He was my best friends boyfriends cousin!

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 9:59 pm

      Thatโ€™s adorable!! ๐Ÿ˜€ I love it when people meet the people they eventually marry at a young age, warms my heart. X

  14. 13th June 2018 / 7:45 pm

    And now I know why you moved to Aberdeen ๐Ÿ˜‰
    I also met my boyfriend online (even worse: on World of Warcraft, talk about stigmas lol) and we’ve been in a happy relationship for almost 7 years now.

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 10:00 pm

      Aww yay, thatโ€™s great! Go you two! ๐Ÿ˜€ x

  15. 13th June 2018 / 7:46 pm

    I met my husband online! I agree, there are still a lot of judgement when you say you met your significant other on the internet. You’d think by now, with how everything is done online now a day, people would be used to it. We have been together for 8 years and just celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary ๐Ÿ™‚

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 10:01 pm

      Congratulations on 8 years together and 6 years married! Thatโ€™s wonderful! ๐Ÿ™‚ x

  16. 13th June 2018 / 7:48 pm

    Awww! You guys are so cute! This was such a lovely post. <3
    I tried internet dating once and that relationship was long distance. That didn't end well but it wasn't anything to do with the online dating aspect, we just weren't compatible! I met Conor because he played in a bandioke band with my friend, at which my housemates and I we're regular attendees and participants ๐Ÿ˜‰ we started talking a bit then he asked me out. And here we are nearly 3 years later, we survived uni together and living together for a year and we're just about to move into our own house. He's a pain in the but sometimes but I love him!
    Menna x

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      13th June 2018 / 10:02 pm

      Thank you ๐Ÿ™‚ Aww thatโ€™s so cute! Well done you two! โ€œHe’s a pain in the but sometimes but I love him!โ€ I think most women feel that way about their other halves ๐Ÿ˜‚ I know I do, anyway. Neal drives me crackers some days but I couldnโ€™t be without him. X

  17. 13th June 2018 / 10:38 pm

    โค๏ธ this is such a lovely story Ruth, Iโ€™m glad that two such special people found each other, you would probably never have met if it hadnโ€™t been for online dating ๐Ÿ˜Š

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      14th June 2018 / 10:00 am

      Aww, thank you, lovely. I know, it’s so crazy to think that! ๐Ÿ™‚ Thank goodness for the internet. x

  18. 14th June 2018 / 9:02 am

    Awww what a lovely story! I met my girlfriend on Tinder and we’ve been together over a year and living together as well so definitely don’t knock internet dating until you’ve tried it!

    So glad to see you happy with Neal ๐Ÿ™‚ Wishing you both all the best!

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      14th June 2018 / 10:01 am

      Yay, that’s so lovely! I think Tinder probably has one of the worst reputations of the lot, so it’s even nicer you have a success story from it ๐Ÿ˜€ x

  19. 14th June 2018 / 2:12 pm

    Ahh this is so sweet to read! Im not sure I would ever try online dating… unless I haven’t found anyone and really want to settle down! I just prefer to meet people in person first I think otherwise it makes me really anxious not knowing who is on the other end! Although I am only 17 so plenty of time! Haha!! Im so happy yours worked out!! xx

    http://zoe-ware.com

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      14th June 2018 / 3:54 pm

      Yeah, that’s true! If you enjoy meeting people in person, then that’s great. I’m just hopeless at doing that haha! You’ve definitely got plenty of time to enjoy yourself just now, though ๐Ÿ™‚ x

  20. 14th June 2018 / 9:59 pm

    This is so beautiful Ruth, Iโ€™m so glad you both found happiness! Iโ€™ve known my husband since I were 15 years old and we became an item the year I turned 18. I havenโ€™t looked back, a house and two kids later I canโ€™t imagine my life without him. Heโ€™s seen me at my worst and best, and relationships will always have ebbs and flows – but it makes it a stronger bond it really does!
    Internet dating wasnโ€™t really massive when I were in me teens (old fart!), and to be honest, I pretty much went straight into a relationship from the off to not experience dating! But this for someone who is looking to that route and if I were Iโ€™d totally head to you for advice!

    Gorgeous couple, gorgeous post! Massive loves!

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      14th June 2018 / 10:17 pm

      Awww, it’s so wonderful that you met so young and have been through so much together, though! I love that! ๐Ÿ™‚ Thanks for the lovely comment, beautiful!

  21. 14th June 2018 / 10:18 pm

    This is the cutest story ever! Neal sounds amazing! Congratulations!!

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      14th June 2018 / 10:23 pm

      Thank you so much! ๐Ÿ™‚

  22. JILL
    15th June 2018 / 12:28 pm

    Ruth this is the SWEETEST! I’m all warm and fuzzy. I’m also a fan of any post that includes the phrase “as an avid catfish watcher”, Jill (stilljill.com) x

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      15th June 2018 / 1:55 pm

      Haha, thanks Jill! ๐Ÿ˜€ x

  23. Jay
    17th June 2018 / 10:56 pm

    This was an amazing read and gives me hope. I have had bad experiences with internet dating facing many many rejections just for the way I look. You too are perfect together.

    Have a great day ๐Ÿ™‚

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      18th June 2018 / 9:42 am

      Awww thank you, Jay! ๐Ÿ™‚ Don’t lose hope!

  24. 18th June 2018 / 3:40 pm

    My friend’s sister met hers on Facebook and now they’re happily married. Not all internet dating is bad. Hope you two have a long-lasting relationship.

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      18th June 2018 / 3:41 pm

      That’s lovely! ๐Ÿ™‚ Thank you x

  25. 20th June 2018 / 10:29 am

    Aww this is such a sweet post!
    Iโ€™ve not tried internet dating – mainly because I have been with my husband since I was 19 ( which is almost 10 years ago now ๐Ÿ˜ฑ). However I no SO many people that are in successful relationships with people they have met via online dating! So I think it is a great way for people to meet! So glad you have found someone so special ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ’ž

    • ruthinrevolt
      Author
      20th June 2018 / 11:28 am

      Awww, that’s wonderful you two have been together so long and from such a young age!! ๐Ÿ˜€ That makes me smile! And thank you, lovely!

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